Pathways

Sexual assault is a broad term that encompasses any sexual act inflicted against someone without their consent. It is a criminal offence. Sexual assault can happen to anybody and can be perpetrated by anybody.

Rape is legally defined in the UK as the penetration with a penis of the vagina, anus or mouth of another person without consent. Sexual assault by penetration is the penetration of another person’s vagina, mouth or anus with any part of the body other than the person, or any object, without the person’s consent. It can carry the same prison sentence as rape.

Consent is an agreement reached without force, coercion or intimidation between persons. Non-consensual sexual activity occurs when consent is not reached or when somebody does not have the physical or mental capacity to give consent. Watch this video for a quick straightforward explanation of consent.

If someone is incapacitated (for example, they can’t speak or move) through the consumption of alcohol or drugs, then they are unable to consent to sexual activity (regardless of whether or not the individual willingly consumed alcohol or drugs). 100% of the responsibility for any act of sexual assault lies with the perpetrator.  

The term ‘drug rape’ is used to refer to sexual assault that takes place after the perpetrator has given a drug to the victim. The drug Rohypnol is sometimes referred to as the ‘date rape drug’ but other drugs, including prescription medication and most often alcohol, can be used to try and make someone vulnerable to a sexual assault.
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Drug rape is most commonly associated with strangers or recent acquaintances. However, it is also an aspect of the sexual assault of people in their own homes, for example, through the forced misuse of tranquilisers and other prescribed medication.
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People’s reactions to different drugs will vary: some might be unable to move or speak; some might have short or long-term memory loss and some might be stimulated sexually. The effects of drug rape and being “spiked” can be extremely frightening. Click here for more information. 

The term ‘date rape’ is often used to describe sexual assault that occurs between two people who know each other, for example, as acquaintances, friends or lovers, and/or two people who have been on a date or out socially together. ‘Date rape’ is not a legal term or specific offence. The term can be an unhelpful and misleading label because it infers that sexual assault by a known perpetrator is “not as bad” as sexual assault by a stranger – this is not correct.

Absolutely, yes. Everyone has the right to say “no” to sex, to withdraw or withhold their consent for any sexual act, on any occasion and under any circumstances, regardless of whether they’ve given consent to sex with that person in the past and regardless of whether they’re married or in a relationship.
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Staying in a relationship that involves or has involved sexual assault does not mean someone is “weak” or any less deserving of specialist support and justice than someone assaulted in any other kind of circumstance. There are many reasons why someone might stay in an intimate relationship that is violent or/and abusive, including fear, shame and self-blame, concern for their children and hope that their partner’s behaviour might change. Click here for more information.  

• You may find that your memory of the incident is patchy, hazy, fragmented and inconsistent. You may well have a fairly clear memory of the moments leading up to the incident but that you’re struggling to remember what happened when the assault actually took place.
• A useful metaphor is to describe your memory as a jigsaw puzzle. The pieces are scattered - it’s not clear where they go and how they’re all connected. Whilst some pieces are clear and vivid, others pieces are simply not there. Why is this so?
• Whilst the incident took place, your brain was in survival mode. It was searching for and focussing intently on things it thought were going to be pertinent to your survival – for example, a door handle, a passer-by or an escape route. These are the things that you can now remember clearly and vividly. You may well find that what you remember is sensory, for example, a smell, a sound, a colour or a feeling.
• In contrast, you remember less clearly the things your brain wasn’t paying attention to - those things that weren’t pertinent to your survival, such as the time or location. Normally, when we recall events that occurred in the past, our recollection of those events gets worse over time. In contrast, when people recall experiences of sexual assault their memory can actually get better over time.
• An understanding of the way the brain may operate after an incident, informs the trauma-informed response of various support services, including Care and Concern. Care and Concern is committed to providing you with the time you need whilst you come to terms with what has happened to you.  
  

• ‍Prior to the incident, you might have thought you would have acted differently – that you would have fought instead of freezing. This can be difficult to understand. 
• It may help to look at your actions in terms of basic human survival instincts. As human-beings we are set up to constantly be on the look-out for danger. When we detect a threat, our brain goes into survival mode, meaning the instinctive, intuitive, habitual part of our brain (the right side of the brain) takes over. 
• We initially freeze to assess the threat for a moment and prepare for a suitable response. If we recognise the threat from a previous experience, then the brain may select a response based on that previous experience. However, when we have never experienced the threat before, and we therefore have no reference point, freezing, rather than fighting or running away, is our brain’s way of looking after us and ensuring we survive the danger.
• Whilst the right side of the brain is determining a response, the left side of the brain in effect temporarily shuts down. The left side of the brain is associated with what we might perceive as logical decision-making: it’s the part of our brain that puts things in order and processes things to do with place and time.
• When the danger has gone away, the left side of the brain effectively re-boots and this is when we begin to try and make sense of what has happened.
• An understanding of the way the brain may operate after an incident, informs the trauma-informed response of various support services, including Care and Concern. Care and Concern is committed to providing you with the time you need whilst you come to terms with what has happened to you.